Friday’s Rants from the SoapBox in My Living Room

Posted on May 24, 2013 by motherofmadcatsandbabies

Welcome to my Friday’s Rants from the Soap Box in my Living Room. A small space in the week where I can have a chunter about things that have made me twitch with annoyance or made me question if the world has gone mad or not….
I also linked up with MummyBarrow for her Ranty Friday. You can find her blog and link up here if you’d like to join in. A good rant can be therapeutic. Click on the link at the end to join in!

Last week, LSH and I went to see the new Star Trek movie, at the cinema. We thoroughly enjoyed it, we are both geeks and love Star Trek, and we had a really nice evening out. I am now going to confess, that we are one of “those” couples, that takes their own snacks, to the cinema, and you can gasp in horror or cluck at our being tightwads if you like, but it’s my rant, so bear with me.

We go to the movies. We pay the full price for the tickets £10.70 each. which is £21.40, we then pay for popcorn, or a hot dog, nachos, sweets, and a drink. If we had bought a large cola and popcorn, each, it would have cost us nearly £15! You add that to the cost of the tickets and you are at £35. Plus the cost of a babysitter and petrol and you have an expensive evening out. Don’t get me wrong, I love going to the movies, and it is a treat for us, but we aren’t made of money, and to pay so much for popcorn and a fizzy drink, seems outrageous to me.

I posted the question on Facebook, and one or two friends pointed out that the cinema companies have the right to charge what they do, they have to make a profit etc. and if they didn’t mark up the costs of snacks by so much, they wouldn’t make any money. I cannot believe this is true? To charge nearly a 600% mark up for a drink and popcorn, is utterly insane. They wonder why we bring our own snacks, which cost us less than £5?

I have to wonder, if they need to look at why they aren’t making a profit, if they have to slam such high charges for food and drink in order to survive? If we want to watch a movie at home, on our wide-screen TV, we pay anything between £2-4 for the movie, downloading it for 48 hours from our cable provider, then I make popcorn (costs less than £1 for a pack of popping corn) and we buy sweets or treats from the supermarket. It isn’t a big screen experience, I will admit, but when you are on a budget, and have other things to spend your money on, it must be understandable? People, in this current financial climate don’t have the money to spend on expensive snacks. If we are going to spend so much money, on “food”, I would rather go to a decent restaurant, where I can sit, eat and enjoy what I am paying for, not fork out for not particularly good popcorn, pay almost £4 for a bottle of water to wash it down with….

Am I wrong? Is it acceptable for them to charge so much? Is it really worth it? Are you a secret cinema snack bringer too like us? Do you work for the cinema and have a really good explanation for how the prices of snacks are set? I’d like to hear your thoughts?

Posted in Uncategorized | 4 Comments

I am angry!

Posted on May 22, 2013 by motherofmadcatsandbabies

It’s hard to write this post, because I realise that I sound ungrateful and resentful, and I do know, that there are other people, families and parents out there going through far worse, than what we have experienced. I am not very good at expressing myself verbally, so I am writing it all down, in the hopes that I will get it off my chest, and then I can move on!

I am angry, that it has taken 2 YEARS to get a diagnosis, of glue ear/chronic mild ear infections, that have caused my poor little boy so much pain, and discomfort. I am angry that health visitors, gp’s and other experts fobbed us off, telling me he was “just being a difficult toddler” and that no one picked up that there was something wrong, even when I mentioned his ears being an issue.

I am angry that the NHS would have either closed his case, or put us to the very end of the queue, because according to their tests, his hearing and speech are ok, and he doesn’t need grommets for that, even though he clearly is in discomfort, most if not all the time. I am angry that we have had to use our limited private insurance, to see an ENT specialist, who within minutes, had explained to us that Small Boy is a classic case, that all of his issues, being so high needs, easily irritable, lots more tantrums than normal, clingy behaviour, anxiety in crowded and noisy spaces, and meeting new people, as well as his terrible sleep are explained by the fact that his ears are basically causing him to feel pain and discomfort like you feel when on a plane and the air pressure changes, and you cant get your ears to pop, ALL THE TIME and has probably felt like this for at least a year, if not longer, tracking back to his first ear infection at 6 months old and that a simple, painless and quick surgery, will solve all of this and that he should have had this done months ago. I am angry that at his 2.5 year health check, the Health Visitor basically told me that she was more worried about his weight, and his BMI (which in fact was inaccurate, anyway, because she got his height incorrect) than the fact that we had not got any sleep for over 18 months, and that I mentioned his ears being a possible issue, and she fobbed me off, because he didn’t fit the “criteria”, when in fact, if she had listened to me, and looked into it, she would have found he did. I am angry at myself for not pushing harder, at that appointment, and for not realising sooner that it was actually something simple we could have sorted more quickly.

I am angry, that according to the NHS, his hearing is fine. When in fact, it isn’t. According to the tests he had yesterday, he is like me, and in the 1% of the population, who has beyond excellent hearing, and can hear sounds others can’t, so he has been compensating, and his hearing appears normal, when in fact for him, it is sub par. When he does have his grommets, or the fluid is cleared, he will struggle, because he will be able to hear so clearly, and it will take him time, and us patience to help him to learn to deal with his amazing hearing, so he doesn’t become overwhelmed. I am angry that he will likely need some help learning to break habits and learn to cope with normal hearing and not being in pain, and will have to learn how to deal with groups, crowds and being out of control of his environment, something he should be able to manage by now, at his age, but because of his ear issues, is behind in, and will need some support at nursery.

I am angry, that I have to take his dummy away, because it is actually making the fluid build up worse, but that I can’t explain or get him to understand why, that he can’t have the only thing that comforts him and relieves some of his pain, when he sucks it (think of sucking sweets on a plane, to help your ears)

I am angry, that people judge my parenting, question my/our medical decision making process and keep suggesting we put things in his ears, or seek non medicinal help, when clearly, we have thought about this option, and have done everything else we can, and feel that this is the best thing for Small Boy.

I am angry at the people on the bus, this morning, who decided I was a crappy parent, and not “controlling” my toddler, who was tired, upset and frustrated because he can’t have his beloved dummy and at the bus driver who treated us with so little compassion and under standing, despite apparently being a parent himself.

Most of all, I am angry at myself, because I feel like I have failed my little boy, that some how, I should have gotten this right, and figured it out sooner, and got him the help he needed, faster.

I will calm down, I will be fine, my anger will ease, and I will get on with life, but today, I am mad, hopping mad, and I am not suffering any fools gladly.

Thank you for reading. Please think before you comment, I am not in a place to hear suggestions for his ear treatment, or thoughts on what we should do instead of grommets.

I have linked this post up with Verily Victoria Vocalises for her Post, Comment, Love linky. Click on the linky to join in!

Posted in Family, Health, Parenting | Tagged ear infections, ENT, grommets, hearing tests, NHS | 4 Comments

Wordless Wednesday – One yummy cupcake…

Posted on May 22, 2013 by motherofmadcatsandbabies

I am normally very fussy about my cupcakes. The amount of icing to cake has to be just right and not too cloyingly sweet. The bonus of this one, was that it was also gluten and dairy free, so perfect for LSH’s mini birthday celebration last night. They went down a treat and were perfect!

Posted in Wordless Wednesday | 5 Comments

So, why on earth am I trying to run in a 10k race?

Posted on May 21, 2013 by motherofmadcatsandbabies

I wrote a brief blog post about signing myself up for a 10km race, which I plan to run, in September of this year. The Richmond River Run to be exact.

Given that I am trying to lose some weight, and am not in any great shape at the moment, due to a serious knee injury from before Christmas, and I am exhausted and sleep deprived, it does sound like a bit of an insane goal.

Before I got pregnant with Small Boy, I was able to run 2-3 miles, easily, and actually ran in a 5km Race for Life the week before we found out we were pregnant with Small Boy, and did it in a respectable time. I love running. I find it helps to clear my head, and as I loathe any form of group exercise, and have no coordination, so look like a total fool when I attempt classes like Zumba, or similar, running is my “exercise” (unless you count walking everywhere, because I don’t drive) and I enjoy it. I get very sweaty, and I don’t look svelte and sleek like some of the runners I see, with their professional gear, expensive barefoot shoes and water bottles but I find it works for me.

I tried to start running again in November last year, but after damaging some tendons in my knee and ending up with a fluid build up and an infection in there, and being ordered to rest it for 3 months, my running shoes have been gathering dust since but have been dug out again recently.

Why am I pushing myself to run 10km, with only 4 months to get fit and in shape for it and my knee is still painful?

Because it will give me a big goal to work towards, and when I set my self what seems like an impossible task, I pretty much try reach it, and usually succeed (hey, I gave up Facebook for 60 days, and nobody thought I would make it, if I can do that, 10km will be a snap)
It will be good for my mental health, to get me running again, I find life easier to manage, when I am getting regular exercise, the endorphins that are released when I run, are far better than anything else I can describe and make me feel really good about myself
It will give me some short-term, and long-term fitness goals to work for
I will hopefully lose some weight in the process
Most importantly of all, I will be raising money for Myeloma UK, which is the charity I support. My mother died of complications related to her treatment for Multiple Myeloma, and raising money to help them find better treatments and towards research into the disease means a lot to me and our family.

I plan to try to blog about my training, and what long-term and short-term goals I am going to set myself and about my progress. I am still unsure about whether I want to put my actual weight, and my weight loss goals on the blog, for public view, but I may change my mind on that.

So there you go. I have been out for some gentle jogs recently and am slowly getting back into the swing of running and pacing myself. I am hoping to be properly up and running, pardon the pun, by the end of this month. I also have a running buggy, which I plan to use, with Small Boy as it’s passenger. It will be good for him, to see me exercising, and also, he loves it when we run, with the running buggy and encourages me, “run faster Mummy”, “don’t stop”, so I have my own built in coach and motivator!

I will also be setting up a page for raising funds for Myeloma UK. I am hoping to raise £500 this time round. Who knows, maybe next year, I will be in shape to run a half marathon. Time will tell!

I am linking up this post with The Oliver’s Mad House for her Active Family link up for this month. Click on the link and join in or read about what other bloggers are doing!

Posted in exercise | Tagged exercise, fitness, Myeloma UK, Race For Life, running, The Richmond River Run, weight loss | 2 Comments

Magic Moments – A birthday celebration

Posted on May 20, 2013 by motherofmadcatsandbabies

This weeks Magic Moment includes some pictures from Small Boy’s Birthday party. His birthday was almost 3 weeks ago, but we planned his party for this past weekend, because we wanted to have a picnic in the local park, which has a lovely play area, and a sandpit, with some of his friends, and we were hoping the weather would co-operate.

If you have read this blog before, you will know that we have had some issues with Small Boy’s sleep and problems with his ears. We think that one of the side effects of his ear problems is sensitivity to noise and crowded space, and being out of control of his environment. He is slowly becoming less stressed by these things, and is finding them easier to manage, but for his day, we felt that an outside area, where he could have space, and he and the other children could run about, and play in an open space, was a good plan. I must admit, I was very freaked out by the weird weather we are having, and was expecting more sunshine, and did refresh the weather app on my iPhone at least 4x an hour checking for signs of rain, but the weather did behave, and whilst it wasn’t as warm as we had hoped, the children had so much fun, and went home sandy, full of cake, and hopefully happy!

Small Boy was in his element, and had so much fun. It was lovely to see him so happy, relaxed and calm. He normally is very anxious, clingy and unsettled in environments he is not familiar with, and in noisy places with lots of people, and often needs a lot of input from LSH or I, to be able to cope, but for his day, he was like a different child. A friend of mine, who was at the party, remarked that she had never seen him so relaxed and happy.

It has been a hard road, learning what works for this sensitive, high needs, special little boy. He is a lot like me, introverted, prone to anxiety when not in control of his environment, and struggles when with large groups of people in enclosed spaces, then add the complication of pain, discomfort and some mild sensory impairments from the chronic ear infections, and you understand why he needs a bit more input than your average 3 year old. To see him confident, and enjoying himself, and not needing me so much, this weekend, was really magic.

Click on the Linky Below, to join in the fun at The Oliver’s Mad House and add your own post….

Posted in Uncategorized | 3 Comments

Recipe of the week – Gluten free, dairy free cheese on toast with basil and tomatoes!

Posted on May 19, 2013 by motherofmadcatsandbabies

I often have people asking me what I actually feed LSH, because if his dairy and wheat intolerance issues. I think the idea of not using wheat and cows milk products can be quite scary for someone, when they aren’t used to adapting recipes, or finding alternative ingredients.

This recipe is a snack/light lunch, that I use often, as a quick meal, for LSH and the kids and I love it too. It is made with gluten-free bread, from Genius, which as far as I can find, make the best commercial, available in most supermarkets, gluten-free sliced bread, useful for toast and sandwiches etc. You can of course, make it with normal bread as well.

You need:

6 slices of bread, toasted lightly
a dozen or so cherry tomatoes, washed and sliced in half
a round of soft goats cheese, that is a cream cheese consistency
a handful of fresh basil leaves, chopped or cut finely (I just cheat and cut the leaves with scissors)
one clove of garlic, finely mashed
3 tbsp. of good quality olive oil
A hot grill oven

Mix the basil, mashed garlic, and olive oil into the goats cheese, until well blended in. Taste, and if you want to add some salt, feel free, I find goats cheese is salty enough, it doesn’t need it, but it’s an individual taste thing.

Spread the mix on toast, then pop some sliced tomatoes on the cheese. Put them under a hot grill for about 2-3 minutes until the tomatoes are slightly toasted and the cheese has melted a little.

Serve immediately. This goes down a treat with a glass of cold white wine, but that’s just for the weekends, of course!

So there you go, a tasty, dairy free and gluten-free lunch or snack, that’s easy to prepare!

Posted in Gluten free/dairy free cooking&baking | Leave a comment

Silent Sunday

Posted on May 19, 2013 by motherofmadcatsandbabies

Posted in Silent Sunday | 15 Comments

Saturday is Caption Day

Posted on May 18, 2013 by motherofmadcatsandbabies

I have in my head, what the conversation between these snails would be, but it’s Sat Cap day, so you all have a go instead?

Link up at Mammasauras or click on the linky below to see more Sat Caps and join in the fun!

Posted in Saturday is Caption Day | Tagged Sat Cap | 12 Comments

Friday’s Rants from the Soap Box in My Living Room!

Posted on May 17, 2013 by motherofmadcatsandbabies

I recently ranted about manners and how rude people are, it seems, and how we as a society are forgetting our manners. This rant is on a similar theme, this week!

I am horrified by how rude people are to those who are serving them in shops,restaurants, and anywhere where the public generally expects a service.

I have high standards, I expect good value for the money I pay for things, but I also hold myself to a standard of being polite and pleasant to those who provide services. Just because someone is on the end of a call, in a customer service centre, does not mean I can be rude to them, any more than I would expect them to be rude to me!

I actually challenged someone today, in a supermarket, when they were appallingly rude to the woman behind the cash til, serving them. The “customer” had handed over her card, to pay for her purchases, but it would seem, she put the wrong PIN number into the machine, when completing the transaction. This, of course, meant her card was rejected. The woman serving her told her this, and asked her to put her PIN in again. The woman then started yelling at her, “you did this, you pressed the wrong button, you have messed up my card”. The woman behind the counter pointed out to her, that the machine was saying “incorrect PIN” and that it was nothing she had done, and the woman continued to yell at her and accuse her of tampering with her card. The poor woman behind the counter, trying to be calm, and polite, as is probably demanded of her, in her job description, kept trying to explain that it was simply an incorrect PIN and it needed to be re-entered. The other woman then swore at her, and called her a bitch. I then decided, enough was enough, and I interrupted, pointed out to the rude woman who it was HER error, and not the woman serving her, and that if she wanted, I could call the store manager over and explain to him how rude she had been, and that it was actually her fault. I try not to lose my cool or get involved in other people’s business, but I wasn’t standing there, watching someone be so rude, because of something that was actually her fault. Fortunately, she calmed down, and re-entered her PIN, and then realised she was actually entering the wrong number. She then took her card, picked up her shopping, and walked away, no apology, no response to the woman she had behaved so appallingly towards. Frankly, my 3-year-old has tantrums like this. I expect it from him, he is a toddler, not in control of his emotions, but a grown woman, in a shop? Horrifying.

It seems to be common, to think that it is ok to yell at those providing us a customer service. It’s apparently acceptable to yell at someone, to call them a rude name, and then to walk away without apologising. It appears to be fine to be rude to someone in a mobile phone shop (ok, I know that dealing with mobile phone providers and sales people can be an issue) because you happen to have waited for a few minutes, but are in fact in a queue, and were not first, and need to learn to be more patient. It would seem it is considered normal to berate a member of the waiting staff team, in a café, when your child is running amok, and causing chaos, climbing over tables and laying on the floor, when they trip over said child and nearly pour hot coffee all over them.

I could go on, I see things like this all the time. I am sure I am not alone.

Really, I despair. I feel like I want to avoid humanity some days, when I see people being so rude and treating people, their fellow human beings, like a lesser species, simply because they work in the service industry.

That’s my rant for this week. Link up with some other rants by clicking on the Linky below! Have a good weekend!

Posted in Soap box Friday | Tagged customer services, manners, MummyBarrrow, Ranty Friday, rudeness | 7 Comments

Parenting Confession time: Please don’t let your child rummage in my handbag!

Posted on May 16, 2013 by motherofmadcatsandbabies

Sometimes I blog about things, that seem to me like a sort of parenting confession session. This blog post is one of those!

I had an interesting conversation, with a mother, at a toddler group that Small Boy and I attend, occasionally. (Not the one I work at) My bag, was on the floor, under a chair, and Small Boy was playing happily, and I was chatting a friend, who is a parent, and a child-minder. A small child, aged about 18 months old, wandered across, and sat down on the floor next to us. I said hello to her, and offered her a toy, I had found on the chair, and then carried on chatting. I then noticed she was trying to get into my bag. I gently removed the bag, and put it on the chair, which of course, the little girl didn’t like, and she started to cry. I felt a bit mean, that I had made her cry, and looked about for her mother. She came across, and I explained that I had moved my bag, out of her reach, and that she was a bit upset. The mother was semi apologetic, but told me “oh, she likes handbags, I let her play with mine, all the time, she probably didn’t mean any harm”. I replied, “well, I’ve got paracetamol, hand santisier and migraine tablets in there, and I wouldn’t want her to get hold of any of those things”. She looked at me a bit oddly and wandered off. My friend and I then had a brief conversation about not letting our kids play in our bags, and then we got dragged into making pasta necklaces by our children.

Afterwards, I was thinking about it, and I realised that I don’t like anyone, rummaging in my bag, my own children are not allowed to play with it’s contents, I even prefer LSH not to go into it, unless he asks. I do let Big Girl get things out, or I may ask her to go and find something for me, but as a rule, my bag is off limits. For me it is two fold. As a parent, I don’t get a lot of private space, and my handbag is one space that I regard as mine, and I object to little fingers fiddling away with my things. Also, as I said above, I keep items that would not be safe, in the hands of small children. My emergency migraine medication or some paracetamol, if ingested by a small, curious child, could be serious, if not fatal. My children know my bag is off limits, and very rarely will even try to explore it’s contents. I learned the hard way, that my bag was not a good toy activity for my children, when in a busy restaurant, having a meal with a friend, who didn’t have children, and was being very polite and tolerant of my then 2 year old Small Girl, (who was a bit bored, after waiting a long time for her food, then not wanting to be confined in a highchair, and had discarded all the toys and child friendly items I had brought with me to entertain her) I gave her my handbag, removed the non safe items (pain killers etc.) and let her merrily empty it’s contents about. She had great fun, and it kept her happy and amused for a good 20 minutes, while we ate, but then when we had to pack up to leave, I realised that not only had she smashed my favourite lipstick, but had posted my travel card through a slot in the floor, next to the table, and we couldn’t retrieve it. This was when travel cards were paper, and not registered online, so basically, I lost a months worth of travel fare, in one fell swoop. After that, I swore that my children would not play with my handbag, or it’s contents and I have stuck to that, ever since.

I have, on several occasions, had to ask friends to not let their children rummage in my bag, when they have come across it, and have gently extracted my bag, from curious little fingers. It often surprises me, that it is ok to let children ferret about in other peoples possessions. I sometimes feel like a control freak, and of course, if you as a parent, are happy to let your child play with the contents of your bag, then that’s not my problem, but I don’t feel I should have to allow it myself.

I did ask about how people felt about this, on my blog’s Facebook page, and on Facebook, and got mixed responses, some agree with me, that handbags are personal space and off limits, and some admitted they let their children play with their bags. It is of course, a personal choice, and it may be that I am of course, being too strict. I would love to hear what your thoughts are…..?

I’ve also linked this post up with Post, Comment, Love, at Verily Victoria Vocalises. Click on the linky to join in!

Posted in Parenting Confessions.... | 10 Comments